Telling the story

So, this week has truly jump started our journey. Through an interesting turn of events, Sarah and I are becoming much more active in telling and sharing our journey. I don't know if this happens to other couples in the process. But at some point following the process and waiting in the background leads to action.  

Look for more updates and sharing from now on. 

Process of Relationship

As my first official blog post, I wanted to use this opportunity to express how important this process has recently become to me. Each day I see more couples making decisions about their future family, whether planned or not, mostly unsure, but trusting...in the process of relationship.

Adoption is a process of relationship. Built of trust while ebbing and flowing of clarity and emotion but always moving.

I often get asked by my close friends about how the adoption "is going" for us. And mostly there isn't much to report as far as action, but still waters run deep. For the past 18 months or so, we have been hopeful and trusting that we have done all that can be done and that God has a plan. For me it is a saving grace to know that there is a plan and I fully trust in it.

Thank you to those that have supported us so far through our garage sales, coffee sales, designer notecards and kind words. They have certainly helped and please remember - as you read this - that you are the person you are because of the way people loved and cared for you. Through adoption we hope to share that love with someone too.

The Path Less Traveled

Our adoption ticker says 9 months, 1 week and 5 days. I guess that could mean that if we were to be able to have a baby the traditional way, we might be nearing the end or already holding our baby in our arms by now. But we are not nearing the end and are arms are still empty. As we wait, I'm reminded of all of the differences we experience on our pathway towards a family, as opposed to someone who doesn't have infertility and is able create their family through pregnancy. Some of these differences can only be understood by someone who has gone through adoption, others are more obvious. Check out my list of differences that we've experienced; sorry if it sounds like I'm negative but sometimes you need to vent these things and I don't really ever talk about this with anyone. Has anyone ever noticed these or thought of other things that I haven't listed?

- Lack of adoption books and magazines at the bookstore: I want to look at magazines and get excited about planning the baby's room, looking at baby stuff, and learn about being a new parent....but I don't really want to read about all of the body changes that occur during pregnancy, the maternity clothes, etc. Barf!

- The "Expectant Mother" space at the grocery store or mall. I'm an expecting mother! I realize I'm not carrying an extra 40 pounds because I'm "not really pregnant", but why do I have to be reminded of this every time I grocery shop!

- Lack of Adoption Cards at greeting card stores. There's an entire section/aisle devoted to baby showers, new pregnancy, and new baby. To date I have found one card for adoption purposes.....one!

- Baby Showers - This is kind of on the fence for some adopting parents. Bryan and I have decided against this before we have placement. As you can see we have enough reminders on a daily basis that we don't have a baby yet; we don't need to come home to an empty baby's room filled with toys, crib, and baby clothes on top of that.

- Baby Registry - Speaking of showers, we can't even register yet because we need to put a "due date" on the registry. So it's not like we can get excited about baby by registering for some goodies now. We have to wait until we are actually matched.

- Websites - The Bump, Baby Center, etc. all are geared towards women who can get pregnant and create their family by that method. I get most of my info from blogs....that God for them!

- Movies and TV shows depicting Adoption incorrectly:
- Glee: Idina Menzel basically saunters into the hospital like she's on a Sunday stroll and points to a baby and says, "I'll take that one". Ok, maybe not quite that, but it was ridiculous.
- Lifetime: Always shows a birth mother plotting to kidnap their baby at the playground or something crazy like this. In reality, birthmothers are amazing and are nothing like that.
- The Orphan: Do I need to even comment on this movie?

This is just what I can think of at the top of my head. I know there is so much more. Our pathway to have a little baby is so amazing, but also so overwhelming at times. But, like my sister always says, "you are closer to having a baby today than you were yesterday". Ok...you are right my sis!

We're back!

Sorry for being MIA lately. Bryan and I have been very busy with work related things which has taken us away from our blogging and has kind of been a distraction from our waiting period. We continue to wait for our family - nothing new has been happening on the adoption front with the exception of all of our family and friends' generous donations to our coffee fundraiser. We have a long way to go, but we are closer than where we were yesterday.

We know that there is roughly a dozen of you out there reading our posts and we appreciate that you are following along. It's almost been a year now that we have been paper pregnant - can't believe that time flies so fast. Though we have been distracted by work, we continue to long for our little family to grow. So, please keep the prayers and well wishes coming. We'll keep on posting to our little family of followers and hopefully we'll be able to post some good news in the next coming year.

Thanks again everyone!

Just Love Coffee Fundraiser

Bryan and I are starting to get our fund raising ideas flowing. Many of you know that we love coffee, and appropriately named, Just Love Coffee Company is very generous in helping many adopting families out there raise funds to help them start their families. Please view our page and tell your friends and neighbors to order coffee. Just Love Coffee donates $5 dollars for every bag of coffee sold. So order your coffee today and drink up people! Everyone we know appreciates a good caffeine buzz.

http://www.justlovecoffee.com/TheBarts

Our Family Profile

Our Family Profile

Positive Adoption Language (PAL)

I saw this the other day from Adoptive Families and from a different blog and wanted to share.